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You don't choose the new target for the spell or ability targeted with Untimely Malfunction's second mode until Untimely Malfunction resolves

Barracks of the Thousand is a pretty absurd reward for transforming this, spitting out more heavy-duty Gnomes basically for free

If you were already planning on buying one of these two, then thats great

Then create a 1/1 red and white Soldier creature token with haste for each muster counter on this enchantment

Cosmium ink variants are legal in any format where the card in question is already legal

Its sub-grade system scores centering, corners, edges, and surface individually, and the BGS Black Label is awarded only when all four sub-grades are perfect 10s